9_Despair makes me.
In September, there were quite a few new things rather than the repetitive daily routine.
For the first time, I didn’t write anything for a week,
Grandfather passed away,
In many ways, it was a time to reflect on the meaning of family.
And then a stone was thrown into my calm heart, causing another stir.
But I didn’t put as much effort into it as I used to.
(Even after writing this sentence, I still think…)
It’s been an eventful month, and as of today, we’re on vacation.
I won’t be carelessly bored or lonely in October.
-. As I am writing this, I have completely left Namgajwa-dong and am living in Hwagok-dong. I wasn’t able to unpack everything, and there are still blue packaging boxes piled up in the living room. Last night, I lay down covered in blankets and thought quietly. Will the day ever come when I visit that neighborhood again to have a meal? Someone might say, “What is a restaurant? Tteokbokki is everywhere, and pasta is everywhere.” But I already miss the restaurants in that neighborhood. It’s not just because of the taste. Even on days when we fought, broke up, or failed to find a job, that restaurant was always there. Even on days when it felt like the world was falling apart, the lady was frying chicken, and regardless of my mood, the tteokbokki was always delicious. Its very existence was comforting. Coming to an unfamiliar town, I miss those familiar things.
Leaving a neighborhood where you have lived for a long time seems to be a bigger deal than you think. Because if this is a breakup, it is also a breakup. I feel like I broke up with my 20s. I feel like I ended up in another town by myself, leaving behind the young, immature me in my 20s who was okay with making mistakes.
by The Edit Editor B
-. Something I promised myself while taking a shower a little while ago.
1. Don’t ask others how they are before talking or revealing it.
2. Don’t look into other people’s feelings. Don’t let other people’s feelings affect your own.
by inju
-.Couples have the same world view and ideology.
The point of smiling is the same, and the point of anger and sadness is the same.
Laughing, getting angry and crying at the same point.
-.Misfortune does not come to you from the front in a crowd of people.
To stab someone in the back while they are laughing and excited.
by U Quiz Jang Hang-Jun (Director)
-.Is there an object that makes members remember ‘me’ from childhood?
The leader is the children’s story writer Roald Dahl. I remember going to the library when I was in elementary school, reading fairy tales written by Royal Dahl and watching movies. Above all, the children in fairy tales were smart, kind, and courageous, which made me think, “They can do anything!” (When you were young, didn’t you mention being president or conquering space as your future dream?)
Iwon is still ‘I can do anything.’ I am more mature than before and have a wider range of actions. If you feel like you lack a little courage in your heart, try challenging yourself with the mindset that you can do anything, just like me when I was young!! I’m sure you can do it!
-.You can definitely change the sweetness that doesn’t seem to be going away right now, so don’t forget that I create my mood this week.
by Gwijjaldan leader (email subscription)
-. Regarding the reason for using the word ‘gift’ in the album title, he said, “It’s just my personal feelings, and in the end, I don’t know what the person receiving the gift will feel when they open the packaging layer by layer. I tried my best to sing these songs again and package what I felt, and I hope it comes across well.”
by Baek Ye-rin
-. When I talk to co-workers who are the same age but are still single, I feel that the world we live in is very different. The things I am truly concerned about and interested in are things like real estate, interest rates, a business I have to do after quitting my job someday, taking care of my family during the holidays, the movie Ashura as a real documentary, and birth rate news, while my friends talk about things like blind dates, certain hot places in Seochon, more progressive issues like gender and the environment, new books by popular authors, Hong Sang-soo, and company gossip. Most of the time, they ask me questions, but every time they do that, I realize how differently each person’s lifestyle changes us even though time flows equally. I am becoming a terrible realist. Of course, neither one is bad.
by ㅈㅣㅇㅠ (blogger)
-.
for now
I won’t write sad poetry
I won’t try to bare my soul
What was the picture in the frame?
I won’t tell you
A person who can’t stand bright things
When you endure the dark
Large candle and box of cookies
Wearing a wide-brimmed hat
I won’t think that it can’t be helped
-.I used to hate it unbearably, but these days, I have strangely (I want to emphasize) something I like. These are the moments when I feel small. The moment when I feel my shortcomings and limitations, when I realize my ignorance, and when I recognize the insignificance of my existence. Most of these moments come when I encounter a person with abilities that I lack, a great creation, or a world that is so big and new. By the time I reach the point where I can shrug my shoulders with my humble talents, I inevitably encounter moments similar to these. Every time, shame comes over me and I break down for a moment.
Ah, I really was nothing.
It would be a lie to say that this moment of awakening is not painful, but to be completely honest, I feel a strange sense of pleasure at the same time. I felt comfortable when I didn’t even know what I didn’t know, but from the moment I found out what I didn’t know, I wanted to study and learn. When I didn’t even know this field existed in the world, I didn’t know it was particularly inconvenient, but after seeing it once, I started to care and became greedy to try it myself. Based on moments that brought me shock or frustration, I set new goals. Although my current status is close to zero and my new goal point is far away, it also means that there is room to move forward and grow, so after despair, hope comes again.
-.But I know. Ironically, what made me who I am today were the moments of despair when I realized I was nothing. The moment I realized that, I desperately wanted to become something, do it well, and move forward. If you think about it this way, it seems that despair is not always despair. Some despair may actually be hopeful and productive. Tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, I will be frustrated and break down again, but in the process, I will dream again, create stories, and grow minutely in the process. Despair makes me.
by Pum (blogger)
-.I like it when things go by in a leisurely manner, as if it’s a little boring.
We spend our holidays saying “I’m bored-”
That doesn’t mean it’s boring and dull.
I use this to mean that this boring time is so happy and good.
A quiet morning is better than a colorful night.
In healing that can only be achieved by paying money,
This is a person who feels fatigue more than fun.
When I didn’t know myself well, I always thought about doing something more when I was bored.
I don’t think I thought about properly savoring the time itself.
These days, I really like being bored as is.
by May (blogger)
-.The weather is nice. enjoy the sunlight I won’t be carelessly lonely.
by unknown
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